tax-day-accountant pickup lines

Do you have any obligations for tonight? BC I'd love to take you home and we can retire those assets.

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IRS = I'm really sexy

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So, how do you feel about things in arrears?

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After I'm done with your assets you'll have to test for impairment

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Wanna sneak out behind the 'hedge' and play with my financial instrument?

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I should recognize you as a capital lease because I will own you at the end of the day.

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Girl: Is that a highlighter in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?

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Girl: I'm a MACRS 150 kind of girl, sorry.

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If I had you, I wouldn't need to perform so many manual entries

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I like to delay my score release so you can enjoy some tension.

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Listen honey, being with me is so good it's taxable.

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Don't you try to claim an exemption, I saw you staring at me across the room.

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Baby, your not just another journal entry, you balance my books.

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I'll let you audit my assets if you let me audit yours. You'll be pleasantly surprised to see what's in my books.

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My Trial Balance just won't balance without you

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I'd do just about anything to see your GAAP.

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Let's fill out a 1040 — you're a 10, and I'm 40.

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If I help you screw Uncle Sam, can I be next?

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I've got an option I'd like to exercise on those plan assets.

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What do you say we go back to my place for some agreed upon procedures?

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Please baby, let me withhold you.

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I've been in public practice for several years, and that's easily the largest endowment I've ever seen.

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I'd love to amortize your discount on bonds payable.

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While some of your assets are obviously not impaired, I'm afraid your major asset will turn out to be immaterial.

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I can show you exactly how to earn your income tax credit.

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Nice assets.

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Listen, I've been auditing your body all night, and it is in damn fine standing.

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Hey, how bout you increase your charitable contributions by handing me your digits?

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Are you 1040EZ? Cause need to fill you in

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Guy : Hey girl! What say we go back to your place and I Audit your Assets?

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If I could rearrange the alphabet I would put U and I near ENron so we could take it down together.

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I'm gonna have to make some adjustments to your bottom line

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Baby, I wanna liquidate your assets.

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I'm done being a sole proprietor, let's form a partnership

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I'll show you my "bits" if you promise not to "byte".

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Let me tell you somethin: if you're filing with me? You're definitely filing a…'10-40.'

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Hey beautiful, did you know that sex toys are deductible this year?

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Listen I don't know what the hell an S corporation is, but I know I want to buy you a drink.

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My goodwill may be intangible, but my fixed assets are rock solid.

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Technically, having sex with me is a charitable gift.

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Hey girl, do you want to make a double entry in my ledger account if you know what I mean.

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Baby how bout we leave this McDonald's and get started on that additional child tax credit?

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I have incredibly liquid assets right now, and they're dying to get a good return.

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Take me home tonight, and I guarantee you'll see an extraordinary item.

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I'll show you my corpus if you show me yours!

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If I had you, I wouldn't need to use my Handbook.

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I know I'm not a 99 or even an 85. I'm a 75, will you take me for who I am?

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Are your assets temporarily or permanently restricted? BC I'd spare no expense to unrestrict them

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In my office, "I.R.S." stands for 'I'm really sexy.'

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Girl: Why?

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Is _____ (name of whatever she's drinking) the material weakness in your internal control?

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Hey babe, what do ya say we go back to my cubicle and fondle each other's PBCs.

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Baby if I take you home? It's an experience you ain't gonna be writing off anytime soon.

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Nice 'boot'.

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Madam: So said who? The man with the very small bank account balance?

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Boy: Are you my revenue?

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The moment I found you, my depreciation method changed from a double declining to a 150% declining balance

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Girl : "But you barely even know me"

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Lady, you make my pants file for an extension.

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Baby girl, I saw you talking to that guy over there. Don't. There's a going concern that he has significant control deficiencies.

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Girl you meet all my criteria, so you better believe I am going to capitalize.

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I don't care if you're rich or poor because I will make your cash flow.

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Trust me, I'm an accountant, I know how to manipulate firm assets

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I'm not ready for this projected benefit obligation.

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Rest assured, I have a large enough staff for adequate coverage.

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Guy: No its a highlighter.....I use Becker wanna get naked?

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Sir: huh!

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This inquiry has been nice, but I'd like to do a walk through of your operations.

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Listen, I'd love to sleep with you, but it's tax day and I feel like I've already been screwed by an entire government agency.

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Sir : Hey madam, your assets are materially overstated.

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Lets try and make this triple bottom line.

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Girl you should've listed me as a deduction, cuz I am dependent on your love.

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This was just a sale-leaseback.

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I'll have to credit you for my asset depletion

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Madame: ah!

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Normally I am strictly IFRS but for you I'd switch to GAAP because you are extraordinary

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How 'bout we do it double entry

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I think we should swap some liquid assets.

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Girl, are you a tax accountant? Cus you make file for an extension

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So do you file electronically around here often?

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I can't prove feasibility in this relationship. I have to write you off.

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Boy: Because I'm so loss without you!

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Hey girl, if I was an accountant, then you just accrued my love.

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Can I be your external control?

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Guy: "Thats right Girl... Benefits while maintaining Independence

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Can I put my substance all over your form?

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What do you say we spend the rest of our useful lives together?

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Guy: Your feet tired? Because you've been running in a straight line in my mind all day along.

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