republica pickup lines

I wanna drill you like an Alaskan oilfield.

republicapolitics

Are you from Florida? Because you’re so hot you make my poll numbers rise. (Marco Rubio)

republicapolitics

The tattoo on my manhood spells "RAN." But when I get excited, it spells "REPUBLICAN."

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Sorry if I seem aggravated -- I'm still upset about that world-class jerk, Michael Moore.

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Didn't we meet at a Klan rally?

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Don't worry, babe, we'll extend the Bush tax cuts in time!

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Make like the surplus and go down on me.

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How about I drop my pants and show you some shock n' awe.

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You got more curves than a NASCAR race track!

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The Republican presidential debate is going to be like a singles bar full of unattractive men trying to get you drunk enough to vote for them

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Drunk women are disgusting. By the way, I am going to win the drunk woman vote. (Donald Trump)

republicapolitics

I want to be near your vagina so much, I'll write laws about it.

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Are you from a swing state? Because I’d love for you to swing my way. (Jeb Bush)

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Another drink, Barbara and Jenna?

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I'm all for No Child Left Behind. I'm even more for your child-like behind.

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How about I leave no child behind... in your womb!

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Preemptive strike! (Slap her ass)

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Wanna find out why they call me a Repub-lickin'?

republicapolitics

Why do I want to fuck you? You're poor and I'm a Republican. Duh-doy!

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You must be a WASP because I want you to Bee mine.

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If I had to choose between having a Republican President in the White House, or never being able to see your cleavage again, I'd be stumped.

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Is that a RINO in your pocket, or are you happy to see me?

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Don't worry, babe, we'll overturn ObamaTAX!

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Looking at you has been the only thing that's ever made me question abstinence education.

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I’m a Republican. I love a good Bush. (Rick Perry)

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Hey, let's go strangle some kittens!

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When I ejaculate, you'll see a thousand points of light.

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I have a good job.

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Did you come from a Red State, because I'd love for you to be a taker.

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Did you just fall from heaven? Because you look like an angel donor. (Dr. Ben Carson)

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You like country music TOO??

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The Koch brothers bet me a million dollars! couldn’t strike up a conversation with the most beautiful girl here. Wanna buy some votes with their money? (Ted Cruz)

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The logo for our party is an elephant. Want to see what the elephant and I have in common?

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Are you in the military? Because you even bring me to a full salute. (Rand Paul)

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I'm white, you're white - it can't just be coincidence!

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GOP milk?

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Don't worry, babe, we're serious about Fast & Furious!

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I'd love to hang out with you, but I can't make it a late night -- I'm shipping out to [place] in the morning.

republicapolitics

Wanna see my collection of Ann Coulter books?

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Because of [insert a Republican political figure] leadership, we are strong; because of his vision, we will be even stronger; and because I can't stop thinking about your ass, I haven't been able to stand up for the last half hour.

republicapolitics

Just as the Republican Party boldly confronts big challenges, nothing would please me more than you confronting the big challenge rapidly growing right now in my pants.

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Check out my new Banana Republic shirt.

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Hey baby, can I see an ID. Not because I don't think you're old enough, but because I don't think you're white enough to be from around these parts.

republicapolitics

Hey baby, I'm "bi-partisan" and I can swing both ways .... what are you?

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Don't worry, babe, we'll make the Preezy enforce DOMA, you wait and see!

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You know, in this light you look like you could be Laura Bush's younger, more desirable sister.

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Global warming obviously doesn't exist - YOU'RE the one heating up the place!

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To see you naked, I would turn in my own mother to the Department of Homeland Security.

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I won't tax that ass, because that's theft under threat of a gun, girl.

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Don't worry, babe, I'm not like the others!

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I believe in the trickle down theory. So how about I trickle down the inside of your thigh?

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I'm a uniter, not a divider. So how about you unite your mouth with my shlong.

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I HOPE you CHANGE your mind and give me a 15th chance! You won’t be disappointed. Have I ever lied to you?

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Are you religious? Because I am the answer to all your prayers. (Mike Huckabee)

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I love Dick n' Bush.

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Don't worry, babe, those Executive Orders will never get used!

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I may not be Bruce Springsteen, but I can still Rock your Vote! (Chris Christie)

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Wanna pretend we're Republicans and have gay bathroom sex?

democraticpolitics

Wanna control the media... together?

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Are you from a polling organization? Because I’d love to show you my hard numbers. (Scott Walker)

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You're just like Ann Coulter, but without the penis!

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You put the "leg" in "delegate".

republicapolitics