art-museum-and-museum pickup lines

Hey girl I wanna take my paintbrush and reproduce some Jackson Pollock on that face of yours.

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If I were an art critic, I'd give you a ravishing review.

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If I were Tehching Hsieh and you were art, I definitely couldn’t stop doing you for a whole year.

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If I told you I like your body of work, would you hold it against me?

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Vincent Van Gogh: Ear's lookin' at you!

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Hey girl I see a Futura with me and you.

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Nice to meet you. I would shake your hand but the sign says not to touch the masterpieces.

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Is that a paint brush in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?

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Hey girl call me Rockwell 'cause I'd like to show you my slab-serif.

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Hey girl. Call the Art Loss Register, because you just stole my heart.

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Your sexy figure sure would make an awesome sculpture.

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You know, back in the 16th century, this kind of thing was taboo. My how things change...

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You’re an artist? I'd let you draw me naked anytime

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Call the Art Loss Register, 'cause you just stole my heart.

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You're so fine you could make an impression on Monet.

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You must be a piece of art, because I'd like to nail you up against a wall.

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You had me at the museum entrance.

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You're a work of art - who sculpted you?

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I love anatomy...especially yours.

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See that painting? I'd buy it for you if I had a million dollars.

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Vincent Van Gogh out with me

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If you were Marina Abramovic I would sit in the MoMA lobby and stare at you all day.

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I'd like to hang you up and nail you to the wall.

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Have you ever posed nude?

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How bout you and me go downstairs and brush up on our strokes?

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Like the Mona Lisa smile, I find your smile absolutely intriguing.

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If I were a painter, I'd put you down in paint. I'd hang you by the Mona Lisa and put that girl to shame.

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I'd like to add you to my itinerary…in between V, I, and P.

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I would drag you to a museum, but they said not to touch the masterpieces.

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Your pretty face sure would make a beautiful painting.

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You must be an artist, because I find myself drawn to you.

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Are you into monochrome? Because I'd love to use my charcoal to color us black and white.

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Doesn't it seem like all these paintings look alike?

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If you were words on a page, you'd be fine print.

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Are you a Shepard Fairey poster? Because I can’t believe you don’t already belong to someone else.

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Do fries come with that juxtaposition of light and color

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Aren’t you the model from my figure drawing class?

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Hey girl you shine so bright I need to change my ISO to 100.

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you're so Monet and you don't even know it

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Hey girl, I know you don't accept permanent loans but will you make an exception for my heart?

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Hey girl I'd like to see twenty four frames of you per second.

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Hey girl. It may take me a few days to carefully document your verso and recto sides.

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I would love to draw you. Would you pose for me?

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You're the egg to my tempera.

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Girl, GIMME THAT PUSSSAY.

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Real women have cubes

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Are you an antiques collector? Because I have some junk that hasn't been touched in years.

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Are you the daughter of The David or did God finish sculpting perfection?

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Do you have an audio tour, because I want to hear all about you.

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If I told you your body looked like the Met's Aphrodite, would you hold it against me?

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Being around you makes me higher than attending Rob Pruitt’s ‘Cocaine Buffet.’

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I'm not a photographer, but I can picture us together.

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Hey girl is your name Salvador Dali because you is Persistently in my Memory.

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your perfection infuriates post modernists

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If I was an artist, you would be my picture!

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At first I thought I was looking at a Monet, but you are so much more beautiful up close.

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Is your dad an art thief? Because you are a masterpiece.

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Would you mind if I tour the gallery with you?

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You must be a Richard Serra sculpture because I want to get involved with you, end up stuck in a loop, then get spit out right where I started.

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No wonder the sky is grey today, all the blue is in your eyes.

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The shade of black you are wearing really brings out your beauty.

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I was not aware that living artists could exhibit themselves here...

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I came here wanting to see great art, but I never thought I'd see such a vision of loveliness.

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Let me be your Frank Gehry and I’ll be sure to properly balance your curves.

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Baby you're so fine you could make an impression on MONET.

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You must be an Anish Kapoor sculpture, because I can see myself in you.

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Hey girl I bought Photoshop for the Magic Wand Tool 'cause I wanna make you my selection.

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Sorry for staring, I thought your face was a work of art.

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I may not be an Yves Klein, but I’d be pretty blue if I couldn’t get your phone number.

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I’d better put on my conservation gloves, because you’re too beautiful to handle.

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How about you and me go out by the pool and brush up on our strokes?

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